4/08/2013

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If Microsoft or Apple Built Cars

1. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.

2. Occasionally your car would just die on the motorway for no reason, accept this, restart and drive on.

3. Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to stop and fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this too.

4. You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought a "Car 95" or a "Car NT". But then you'd have to buy more seats.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was twice as reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive - but it would only run on five percent of the roads.

6. The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their cars which would make their cars go much slower.

7. The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.

8. People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for many years.

9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft gas and all auto fluids but the packaging would be supurb.

10. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

11. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

12. If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.

13. They wouldn't build their own engines, but form a cartel with their engine suppliers. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and 4 turbos, but it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T Ford parts on it.

14. There would be an "Engine Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be slower on most existing roads.

15. Microsoft cars would have a special radio/cassette player which would only be able to listen to Microsoft FM, and play Microsoft Cassettes. Unless of course, you buy the upgrade to use existing stuff.

16. Microsoft would do so well, because even though they don't own any roads, all of the road manufacturers would give away Microsoft cars free, including IBM!

17. If you still ran old versions of car (ie. CarDOS 6.22/CarWIN 3.11), then you would be called old fashioned, but you would be able to drive much faster, and on more roads!

18. If you couldn't afford to buy a new car, then you could just borrow your friends, and then copy it.

19. Whenever you bought a car, you would have to reorganize the ignition for a few days before it worked.

20. You would need to buy an upgrade to run cars on a motorway next to each other.

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If you think that taxes are bad, please DON'T EVER USE roads, sidewalks, libraries, public education, anything developed by government research, any Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security, Disability, TANF, unemployment insurance, our courts, our government, police and fire protection, the Coast Guard, Search and Rescue, military, services for the military, national parks, wilderness areas, public parks, public infrastructure, public endowments, grants, backed student loans, FDIC, and you can privatize everything under 147 families who own 90% of capital wealth, so they can rule over you like the peasants you are and charge you fines, tolls, bills, charges and penalties, imprison you, kill you, enslave you indiscriminately, for whatever they want, when they want. Welcome to your No Tax paradise!

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Watanabe

Being the computer curious guy I am, I just bought a cheap Chromebook to try it out. Thus far I am impressed with the little fellah. Things to know:

Cost: $200 (at least this one was... picked up the Acer cheapo version)
What you get:
Small laptop (old netbook size) portable mobile computer
100gb online storage for 2 years (free)
Access to online apps that mimic word, excel, power point
The ability to print using cloud enabled printers
or a standard printer hooked up to another
computer in the house (need to install an app on that comp)
Power adapter
3USB / 1HDMI / 1 LAN connetion port / 1 15 pin monitor port
Starts up quickquick

I see this as a good choice for students as well as the average user. Although I wouldn't recommend this for folks who design, code, draft, etc. as from what I can see this is a good everymans device. WIFI is needed for the best functionality as it is primarily web based.

I am wondering what the cost for the cloud would ne after the 2 years are up, but right now it's 2.50 per month per 25 gigs (not bad... 50 gigs a month for the price of a happy meal per month.

Being a mac fanboy, I will begrudgingly admit that this Chromebook is worth the price... ugh... I hust hope that the Great Fruit doesn't revoke my minion card.

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While still with the Dell sucks mindset.....what would be less expensive, fixing the computer, or buying all new versions of Office, Dreamweaver, Photoshop? Hmm....no contest. :)

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